by Bradley Moore
CHICAGO, IL - In a world filled with uncertainty, there are a few things that we can count on – death, taxes, Nicolas Cage releasing three subpar B-films every year that go straight to Redbox, and that every once in a while, the McRib will be back. But where does the McRib go when it is not back? Some have speculated that McRibby vacations in the Ice Cream Machine around the corner when not on the job. Usually, that is where fudge is made, but right now, it is where ice cream is not. Someone asked – have you ever seen the McRib and a working Ice Cream Machine in the same room? The answer, a resounding “NO.” Has our search for the hiding place of the McRib also solved that age-old question of “Why are McDonalds ice cream machines always broken?” Maybe. Is that barbeque deliciousness really the culprit for years, even decades, of broken ice cream dreams? Possibly. To this day, it remains a complete mystery.
The next time you saunter into your local Mickey D’s, order one McRib and one ice cream cone. My guess? Some killjoy will tell you that they are out of one of them; even worse, both. How can we live in such a world?
Hopefully one day, each and every one of you can enjoy a delicious McRib and a soft-serve cone in the same meal, at the same time, from under the comfort of those beautiful, majestic, and magical golden arches.