How to Celebrate Memorial Day during quarantine
By Danny Neary
Call your Grandpa who fought in WWII to help your prospects in his will.
Take time out of the day to honor those who died for your right to die going to Applebee's.
Honor those who signed up to fight in Iraq by refusing to plan anything out.
Play a war video game so maybe the US can finally break it's losing streak.
Have a bbq on zoom and refuse to admit how depressing it is.