Aunt Susan's Facebook Live Update

By Danny Neary

Oh, hello Facebook Live! It's Aunt Susan and I just wanted to give a few updates on how we're handling the recent societal collapse thanks to coronavirus. Oh well, I'm sure they did their best. Anyway I also want to update you on what to expect this year for the holidays! They're getting closer everyday.

First, when you come over, make sure you don't say anything about the smell, your uncle has taken to watching Fox News so intensely, well, he just doesn't have time to shower anymore. Any whoo, we're looking forward to the upcoming class war, should be exciting! I hope you have that blazer I bought you Lauren, that'll look very sharp when you have to declare yourself a weapon of the state or be publicly executed! Your Mom must be so proud.